I have virtually no experience with babies. I never babysat, never changed a diaper (that I can remember), and, before yesterday, couldn’t remember the last time I held a baby.
No one can prepare you for such a terrifying experience.
My cousin’s wife gave birth on Saturday to a beautiful, perfect, squishy little girl. I ooo’ed and ahh’ed over the pictures and was/am so excited for them!
After my baby shower on Sunday (which was super fun!), I traveled with my mom and a friend to go see said baby and congratulate my cousin and his wife on creating such a perfect human specimen.
My mom, who has held enough babies in her time, held her like a pro. Then, she turned to me with a devious look on her face and I knew it was my turn.
Maybe if she had been a gigantic 10lb baby…maybe then I would have felt more sure that I wouldn’t break her. But, my friends, this perfectly full-term baby weighed 5 lbs, 14 ounces at birth. She was like a little china doll.
My hands immediately started sweating like crazy as Mom handed her to me. It wasn’t the sweet, relaxed arm-crook hold, more of a two-handed “try to support every inch of her little body” hold. She was perfectly polite and slept through the whole thing as I held her as close to my body as I could without fearing that I would suffocate her.
I held her gingerly and, despite her crazy sweetness, passed her off to my mom as soon as an acceptable amount of time had passed.
I fear that my own child will be deprived of human interaction because I’ll be too scared to touch or hold her. It’s different with your own baby, right? I need some reassurance here!
And, I wouldn’t mind some ice cream too.
This monster cookie dough ice cream is SO easy – and no machine required! There is the extra step of making the cookie dough, but trust me, it is very worth it! It is smooth and creamy, with chocolate candies and big, chewy hunks of cookie dough. You’re welcome.
- ⅓ cup light brown sugar
- ⅓ cup granulated sugar
- 3 tablespoons of unsalted butter
- ⅛ teaspoon salt
- ⅛ teaspoon vanilla
- 4 ounces peanut butter
- ¼ cup M&Ms
- ¼ cup peanut butter and chocolate chips
- 1 cup quick cooking oats
- 2-3 tablespoons whole milk
- 2 cups heavy cream
- 14 ounces sweetened condensed milk
- ½ cup M&Ms
- 1. Make cookie dough: With a stand mixer, cream together the butter, brown sugar, granulated sugar, salt, vanilla, and peanut butter. Stir in the oats. Add 2-3 tablespoons whole milk, until cookie dough consistency is achieved. Stir in ¼ cup M&Ms and peanut butter and chocolate baking chips. Divide dough equally between two bowls.
- 2. Cookie dough chunks: Using half of the cookie dough, place small chunks of cookie dough on a parchment paper lined baking sheet. Place in freezer for 10-15 minutes.
- Beat 2 cups of heavy cream until stiff peaks form. Set aside.
- In a large bowl, combine the 14 ounces of sweetened condensed milk with the other half of the reserved cookie dough. Fold in the whipped heavy cream until no white streaks remain. Gently stir in frozen chunks of cookie dough and ½ cup M&Ms.
- Place in covered container and freeze overnight (or at least 6 hours).