I grew up on the “rivah.” This one to be exact:
Which meant that I was in the water at a pretty young age. But, as anyone who has swum in a river or lake knows, there is a BIG difference between pool swimming and rivah swimming.
Specifically, you are never alone. At any moment, something could brush up against your leg/arm/foot, causing sheer, unadulterated panic. And, chances are, you will NEVER know what it was. A harmless fish? Probably. A piranha? Unlikely, but you can’t rule it out. A hungry, (wo)maneating shark? You’ll never know…
Oh, and you also step on random crap the whole time, from slimy seagrass stuff to pinching crabs. Or stinging jellyfish.
But, I digress.
Luckily, I haven’t encountered any sharks in my daredevil, rivah swimming adventures. But, it looks like one got to these poor life preservers…
…Yikes.
- 1 can refrigerated large biscuits (8 per can)
- Vegetable Oil
- ½ can of white frosting (NOT whipped frosting)
- Red food coloring
- Small paintbrush
- Cookie cutter with jagged edges (or a sharp knife)
- Place about 1½ to 2 inches of vegetable oil in a large skillet. Heat to approximately 325 to 350 degrees.
- While oil is warming, remove biscuits from can and peel apart. Using a small, round cutter, cut a hole in the middle of each biscuit (save the middles and fry them to make doughnut holes!).
- When oil is ready,gently place 2-3 doughnuts at a time in oil until lightly browned on each side (watch out – they cook fast!). Place on a plate lined with paper towels to drain when done.
- Put ½ can of white frosting in a microwavable bowl. Microwave frosting for 10-15 seconds, or until the consistency of a thick glaze. Dip doughnuts into glaze and set on paper towels to harden slightly.
- Dye leftover, melted frosting red with food coloring. Paint four red stripes into doughnuts to look like a life preserver. Let frosting harden slightly.
- Using a cookie cutter or sharp knife (I used a porcupine cutter), cut out a chunk of the doughnut so it looks like a shark bite.
{ 37 comments… read them below or add one }
Totally adorbs, Jennifer! I am loving these clever and cute life preserver doughnuts for Shark Week! Looking forward to what you post in the next few days. Fun, fun!
Thanks so much, Stacy!
Hahahaha! These are awesome. I thought of you watching the Shark Week stuff on GMA. A Sharkini bathing suit with a huge bite mark out of the midriff, the shark repelling wetsuit, and a sleeping bag of a shark called a chum buddy. Hilarious. I grew up on the Mississippi. You were most likely to bump into a little Hepatitis in there!!!
Every one of those products sound AMAZING and hilarious!
Oooh is that the river in VA that practically no one crosses? My parents met an older women who, when she found out where they lived said “Oh… I’ve never been to the other side of the rivah!”
Of course, it might have been the possible sharks that made her not want to cross.
Those look so good- I love the shortcut and how thick the icing is!
I’m not sure if it is the same river, but it TOTALLY could be! There are lots of people in my hometown that probably have never left the city limits!
Mmmm donuts!!! My grandma has a pool so I learned to swim very quickly-but I also swam in my share of lakes and such so I know what you mean about the slimy and surprising movements lol
I know, seriously! The jellyfish were the worst – I’ve had some pretty bad stings in my lifetime!
For all the things you mentioned is why I don’t love “rivah” swimming!! Ha-ha. Such a clever treat here though!! Love!
Thank you, Cathy! I haven’t been rivah swimming in a LONG time. I think I’ll stick with pools from now on
These donuts made me smile and then made me very hungry. That is the best set of reactions I can possibly think of! Yum!
Thanks, Pamela!
Super cute and while a cookie cutter with a jagged edge makes perfect sense, I’d advocate for taking a bite out of each one
If I was going to eat the myself, that would have been a WAY better option!
Love these! Swimming in a lake or river with untold inhabitants lurking below…not so much:)
Thanks, Paula!
Growing up with the lakes and rivers of Florida, I’m all too familiar with the icky seaweed bottoms that always freaked me out. These doughnuts are so clever! You mentioned not to use whipped frosting in the recipe. Could you explain why? (I only ask because I have a container in the cupboard and I’m in the mood to make these.)
Hi Mike! If you try microwaving the whipped frosting, it gets way to thin to make a proper glaze! It just doesn’t hold up well to heating
Oh wow how cute are these!
love it!
Thanks so much!
You are so brave and creative! I am watching shark week now and wouldn’t get in the river without a shark cage! I would however, have these cute doughnuts while watching shark week from my couch;)
Thank you, Lisa!
These are insanely CREATIVE! I love them!
Thanks so much, Mimi!
What fun to have a little something for shark bait – yummy for sure! I grew up near a lake and I hear you about stepping on all kinds of disgusting stuff!!
I didn’t mind all the gross stuff when I was a kid, but I’ll take a pool now, thank you very much
Hee-hee… so silly… can’t help but smile at those!
Thanks, Janine!
I’m not a fan of the water, swimming pools, rivers, whatever. The things that lurk there freak me out far too much!
Agreed!
Haha these are so cute! I grew up near a river too but never went swimming in it. I’m such a scaredy cat. A few of these cookies might change my mind!
I mean doughnuts. Duh.
Thanks so much, Reeni! Cookies, doughnuts – it’s all good!
EWWWW river stuff FUHREAKS me out. I hate the feeling of squishy things under my feet. It’s seriously spine-tingling. And dude, bodies of water are beautiful but SO creepy. You never know what kind of freaky monster could be lurking under the surface.
Exactly! One of my best friends is an open-water phobe – we went tubing one time as kids and she was not a happy camper!
You’re coming up with some great treats for shark week! Your life preserver donuts are so clever, especially with the bite out of ‘em:)
Aww, thanks, Sue!